being a boy mom

So, this happened this weekend.

Notice anything missing??  As in, a good chunk of Isaac's tooth?

There was no big traumatic event.  No blood.  No scratching or bruising.  A simple fall on just the right spot on his tooth, and off it broke.  This tiny baby chipped tooth has been taking up all of my brain space since yesterday when it happened.  I'm not sure why, but I'm seriously grieving his whole-toothed smile.

I took him to the pediatric dentist this morning, and he basically gave us two options.  We can leave it.  Or they can fill it in and "fix" it, which involves him being sedated, probably traumatized, because he'd be taken back into a room without me and having strangers poking at his mouth, and only then, just for cosmetic reasons.  And for a "filler" that has a decent chance of falling off because, well, he's a boy.

I feel like this must be some sort of rite of passage being a boy mom.  And as easily as this happened, I'm shocked any of my kids have any teeth at all.

I haven't decided what I'm going to do about this hole-y grin.  I'm far to emotional about it right now to make any decisions.  So, I'm sitting on it for a couple weeks and then we'll decide.

In the meantime, I just spent the day googling "baby chipped tooth" and "boy broken tooth" and I'm comforted by the fact that this is a common thing.  Especially with boys... who have brothers... apparently.  So, maybe it'll just show the neighborhood kids that he's tough stuff (which he is) and perhaps I'll even miss the dang thing when he actually loses it in 5 years.  We'll see.

*sigh*  I feel like this is only the beginning.

Dear Isaac :: 4 months old

My boy whose name means laughter,

Laughter is exactly what you bring us.  We are delighted to hear the man belly laughs you bring to our family.  And somewhat surprised, as your brother didn't belly laugh until close to 8 months old (although he was all smiles).  Along with your laughter, we hear your high pitched squeals often.  Middle of the night included.  We can't help but to laugh before shhh and rocking you back to sleep.

You adore your brother and your doggy.  If they are within eyesight, you are just glued to them.  We often have to tell your brother to be gentle with you as he has been known to want to tackle you with hugs if you are anywhere near the floor.  So, you don't get as much tummy time as I would like, but you're still developing just fine.

You rolled over for the first time, front to back!  You haven't done it much since, but you often roll to your side while in your crib.  We stopped swaddling you cold turkey and haven't looked back since.  You now sleep from about 7pm until 3:30am to eat, and then again until 7am.  I can't complain about that schedule.  You still nurse about every 3 hours, but have stretched to 4 now and then.  You still don't take a bottle, but that is mostly due to me not trying.

Your naps are all over the map.  But I haven't been good at getting you on a schedule.  Right now you take between 2-4 naps a day.  Sometimes it is a short nap and a 3-hour nap.  Sometimes it is four 45min naps.  All over the place.  But you are (mostly) super happy and flexible, so it is nice to be able to take you along to our playdates and bible study and you sleep when you need it.  It hasn't affected your night sleep at all.

But you are definitely my snuggle boy that I prayed for.  Jude was a crib boy, and wouldn't sleep in my arms past 3 months.  But you definitely love snuggling up and falling asleep in my arms.  I'm not worried about you preferring that down the road.  You still sleep in your crib just fine, and this time I know how quickly these days will pass.

At your doctors appointment you weighed 15lbs 12oz and 26.5" tall!  Big boy!  You have been wearing 9 month clothes lately, still mixed in with the 6 month clothes.  But you do not fit into 6 month sleepers anymore.

I love you so much, my snuggle puppy.  I'm so glad God knew we needed you in our family!

Love,

Your Mama

Dear Isaac :: 3 months old

Yikes... so apparently it takes a lot more effort to get around to blogging when you have two kids.  Or maybe it is just that I am running low on blogging motivation.  Blogging is the kind of like running; the more you do it, the more you want to and the easier it becomes.  I'm on a trend of both non-running and non-blogging right now.  :-)  

On to better things...

...

My precious Isaac Lee,

You are just so much fun.  SO much fun.  You are living up to your name and have begun belly-laughing when you are tickled.  You are so interested in the world around you, and especially keep a watchful eye on your big brother.  Just taking it all in.  You sure are a trooper when your big brother walks by and snatches your paci out of your mouth, or shoves another one in.  You are just all smiles.  You are also already interested in television.  I'm pretty sure your big brother hadn't even seen a television turned on at this point in his life, but this is just another benefit of being a second child, I suppose.

You love sitting up supported by the boppy or in the bumbo and seem to be very strong already.  You have recently started to try to support your weight on your legs when we try to get you to stand.  You no longer really like to be sitting in your Rock 'n Play or bouncy seat, but would rather be walking around in Mama's arms to see what's going on or sitting up somehow.  I definitely feel like the newborn days are behind us, and you are officially an infant, becoming your own little person.

You are also a big boy.  At your three-month checkup you weighed exactly 15lbs.  Your big brother didn't weigh this much until he was close to 6 months!  But you are still a great eater, even though you are becoming increasingly distracted.  You have made it clear that you aren't a fan of the bottle, so it looks like we'll be nursing much longer than your big brother did.  You still eat about every 3 hours during the day.  You are also starting to wear 9 month sleepers!  You are just so long.

You eat every 3 hours still.  I don't see that changing anytime soon.  And your sleeping habits are about the same.  You often like to go to bed around 6:30 or even earlier sometimes.  You still get up once or twice a night to eat.

You continue to be just the sweetest boy.  I just love being your Mommy. :-)

Dear Isaac :: 2 months old

My sweet sweet Isaac Lee,

In true second-child nature, this post is late.  And I don't have a giraffe photo to go with it.  I'm so sorry.  You and your big brother keep me busy, to say the least.  And I hope to get your giraffe photo taken soon!

You, my sweet boy, are just pure joy!  You are so quick to smile and I'm near certain I've heard a laugh or two out of you already.  If I am holding you, you always wiggle your way to look up into my eyes.  You love "talking" to me or your Dada.  And if Jude is around, your eyes are glued to him.  I look forward to the day when Jude realizes he can make you laugh.  It's sure to be a good time.

You are also a BIG boy!!  24" and 13lbs 11.5oz at your two month check-up!  This is a whole pound and a half bigger than your brother at this age!  You have rolls on your thighs, which I just love.  And you've already been in 6 month clothes for about a month already.  And your hair is really coming in already, too!  I have a feeling you are soon going to have a full head of hair like your brother.  And a blondie, just like him.  :-)

Nights have been such a blessing.  You go to bed around 7pm at night, like clockwork, and get up to eat around 2:30 or 3am, then again around 6 or 7am.  Sometimes it is just once at night; sometimes twice.  But you eat and are right back to sleep most nights.  I really can't complain.  I love that you have already switched to an early bedtime like your brother.

You had your first little cold this past week.  That's what you get for being the second child - a big brother who gets germs from church nursery and passes them along to the family.  It was sad to see you all snuffly, but we seem to be over it for the most part now.

You eat about every 3 hours and are still a champion nurser.  Usually you eat in under 10 minutes and are done.  I really can't complain in that category.

You really enjoy tummy time... and usually fall asleep.  Whoops.  Sometimes I let you snooze on your belly if I'm close-by. :-)

You have been a way easier baby than I could have wished for.  It's so fun to spend this time with you, knowing how quickly it is going to fly by.

Love you my littlest man,

Mama  

Love having two under two.

I mentioned it in Isaac's birth story, but prior to his birth I had a lot of fear.  Fear about how adding to my family would change it.  Fear about my relationship with Jude changing.  Fear over if I could love this newest baby well enough.  Fear about how much hard work two under two would be (and I always feel the need to distinguish... not just two under two... 15 months is very different from 24!).

Let me repeat (for myself), fear isn't of our Lord!  

Something I am learning, to surrender my fears and worries to the Lord first.  Be quick to pray.  I tend to be quick to google.  And in about 99.9% of these cases, google doesn't end up being the encouragement I'm looking for.

While I was pregnant, I searched for others' experience with two kids fifteen months apart, and my fear was only fueled.  I read things like "I don't know how we made it through the first year", or "It's REALLY hard work - I wanted to pull my hair out", or "My goal was just to survive every day".

Wouldn't you be afraid?

Well, six weeks into this gig with two boys fifteen months apart, I can tell you I had no reason to fear.  I wouldn't say it has been easy, but it certainly isn't the huge insurmountable task I had imagined.  Parenting in general isn't easy.  It is the most challenging and rewarding thing we will ever do. But I don't think that fact changes whether your kids are 15 months or 15 years apart. :-)

In an attempt to be a voice of encouragement in all the blogs out there putting fear into these future-Mamas' hearts, I will say that I have loved and having two boys so close.  A few reasons why....

First of all, we are already in baby mode.  I do diaper laundry a bit more often (because the boys are both in cloth), but I was surprised how easy it was to just slip Isaac right into the routine.  Baths.  Diapers.  Laundry.  Cribs.  No huge transition in that sense.

Jude was too young to really get jealous.  Of course this could just be his personality.  But all-in-all he has pretty much ignored Isaac.  I am pretty sure that now, six weeks later, Jude doesn't remember life without his baby brother.  We had zero sleep regression or anything of the sort.  Life just went on, only with a baby brother in the mix.

I just love watching this bond slowly develop between my boys.  Right now it is basically Isaac happily watching Jude when he's in the room and Jude being on paci-patrol.  Although, today I did catch Jude trying to give Isaac a drink from his sippy cup.  But I know that in the years to come, these two will be permanent buddies and their close age means they will do everything together.  This makes me very excited that God gave us two boys so close.

Despite what I imagined, I can count on one hand the number of times I have had two babies crying and needing me at once.  Those moments do not make up my entire day, but rather are few and far between.  And God has given me that mother-intuition that I need to make it through the challenging moments.

Really.  That last one sums it up.

God has given me what I need for the moment.  He chose me to parent these boys and he'll give me what I need to get through the challenging times.  I won't lie.  It is a busy life.  A full life.  A life full of opportunities to either freak out and question your abilities... or to stop. breathe. give it to God and thank him for the blessing of two sweet boys.  And trust the intuition that he gave you.

But there are many many moments of pure joy in-between the challenges.  It is not all chaos and craziness.  It is also seeing first smiles again.  Sweet baby coos.  Hearing big brother say his baby brother's name for the first time.  And more love than you thought was possible.

God showed me that he created me for this role.  I am enough.  In Him I am enough.  I'm growing up a bit in this role and gradually gaining more and more confidence.

So, is two under two 15 months "easy"?  Ummm... not the word I would use.  It's full.  And busy.  Most often in a good way.  Life is good. 

I don't know it any other way.  And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Dear Isaac :: 1 month old

 

My sweet Isaac,

I'm so enjoying this squishy sweet stage you are in.  You are such a pleasant baby.  You are already cracking smiles for Mama and Dada and just gaze lovingly into our eyes.  If I hold you tummy-to-tummy you are constantly lifting your head to look at my face.  You are already so alert and aware of the people around you.  It's so fun to experience each of these "firsts" with you. 

You are still sleeping in our room.  The difference this time, from your brother, is that I am changing and nursing you in bed.  I might keep you with me a bit longer. :-)  Your brother was kicked out at 5 weeks old, but I'm enjoying having you close.  You are sleeping 5 hour stretches and then usually 3-4 hours after that.  So, I typically get up with you about twice a night.  Although, right now your fussy time is from about 7:30 until 10:30-11pm.  We took you to a kinesiologist about a week or two ago and saw tremendous improvement immediately.  You're starting to act fussy/gassy/in-pain again, so I think another adjustment will help soon.

You basically never wore newborn clothes, as you were already 9lbs 11oz at your two week checkup.  I'm certain you are over 11lbs now.  Possibly 12.  Oye!  My big boy!  I also recently packed up your newborn diapers and you are now up a size in your prefolds.

You have a lot of happy awake times.  You love to just lay on your back and look around and take it all in.  Unfortunately, you have a young big brother who just rampages through the house without looking where he's going, so we have to be very careful where we just set you down.  You are often in the swing, or bouncy seat on the kitchen table.  Or, of course, Mama's arms. :-)

You are taking after your brother - loving your crib.  Already, you will be fussy and tired and prefer your crib to any other place in the house (even Mama's arms at times).  You love to be swaddled up and will take great naps in the crib.  You love taking bath, although your dry skin means you only get a bath twice a week right now.

Your big brother is already so good with you.  He leaves you alone for the most part, but is certain to make sure you always have your paci.  :-)

I'll admit, before you were born I was not loving the idea of going back to the newborn stage.  But let me tell you - I am loving this stage with you.  I'm soaking it up, because now I know how quickly it passes.

Love you my sweet second son.  

Love, Mama

The newborn season.

I'm three weeks and five days into this Mom-of-two gig.  And we've survived so far.  Haha.  I am happy to say that, despite preparing for and expecting the worst case scenario, we are doing well.

The baby fog doesn't lift the second time around.  It is still a cycle of eat, poop (while eating), scream, pee, spit, *insert happy awake time for a couple minutes*, sleep, poop, scream, and poop some more.  The difference this time is I know this is a short season.  I know it gets easier.  The screaming subsides.  The happy awake time lengthens.  And the fun times begin.  I'm trying hard to enjoy the newness of my sweet boy, though.  I don't want to wish it away, yet at the same time I can't wait to see the smiles and hear the laughter.

Many people have asked how Jude has been adjusting.  He honestly hasn't shown a whole lot of interest in Isaac at all.  It's just his young toddler age.  He goes about his daily craziness without much concern for his little brother.  And this is fine by me!  He is on paci patrol - if Isaac loses his paci, Jude is quick to shove it in his face give it back.  He also loves "helping" me change Isaac's diaper - meaning he climbs around on Isaac's rocking chair and empties his drawers while I change Isaac.  The biggest struggle for me concerning Jude has been my recovery from c-section surgery and knowing I'm not supposed to be picking him up, etc... which I have been doing (only as needed) anyway.  It's hard to say "no" to a crying baby who is begging you to hold them (not to be confused with a temper tantrum... we also see plenty of those).

Jude's age has posed some problems, but I think in many ways I'll look back and see how it was even somewhat easier than had he been a few years older.  I have all the struggles any mom would with a 15 or 16-month-old {enter tantrums, being rough, climbing on furniture, and just being a crazy boy in general}.  But he's not jealous.  He hasn't regressed in sleep or anything.  I think he hardly thinks anything of Isaac being around all the time.  He's used to it now.  We're working on being gentle.  I still rarely allow Jude around Isaac for this reason, but I know this will change as they both get older.  We're still very much in just get through the day mode.  I have to say, I am very grateful to Barney for keeping Jude occupied in the same room while I nurse every 2.5-3 hours. {don't judge}

I often find myself wondering, what the heck was so hard about a newborn the first time around??  When it is just me and Isaac, I feel like it's just so simple.  Being a Mama for the second time has definitely eased many of the anxieties I had with Jude as a newborn.  There is also a light at the end of the tunnel.  Isaac is, in general, a much more fussy baby than Jude was.  But, I find it doesn't give me anxiety like it would with Jude.  I feel horribly bad for Isaac as I see him struggle with the gas pain and scream trying to poop {poor buddy}, but it doesn't make my blood pressure elevate and I don't freak out.  I just try to get him comfortable the best I can, and know that this developmental stage will pass soon.  I'm grateful for this perspective this time.

But the mommy-guilt is still real.  While my love has surely doubled, the amount of time in the day surely hasn't.  Right now, Isaac demands most of my attention, and I'm not able to give Jude the one-on-one attention that I used to.  Luckily, Jude is a real daddy's boy and if Dada is home really couldn't care less about me. :-)  I'm fine with this, as it makes it easier.  On the other side of mommy-guilt is feeling like I'm not giving Isaac the same attention I gave Jude at that age.  Of course not - I have a 16-month-old climbing on the couch and grabbing the dog's tail!  I try not to be too hard on myself for this.  It's life.  It is what it is.  And I'm sure that what I'm feeling is normal. 

Right now, I go back and forth between thinking that anyone who has more than two kids must be crazy.... and then also knowing deep in my heart that we're also not done at two.  Having a newborn in the house adds a different dynamic to life.  It's a bit more crazy... a transition... but, as I said, it's a season.  A season where we take things day by day and moment by moment.   A season of chaos, but loads of love.  I'm trying hard to embrace and appreciate the chaos of today and not wish for simpler days ahead.

Isaac Lee... behind the name.

Naming this child was way harder than naming Jude.  I found Jude's name early on, before I even knew he was going to be a boy, and it was just the perfect name.  I loved the sound.  I loved the meaning {praise}.  And I loved the timeless, yet rare, style.

 

It was hard to find a name I loved near as much.  We had a long list that was ever-changing throughout my pregnancy.  The name we chose for this child would somewhat determine the "style" of our kids names.  Were we going biblical?  Were we going unique?  What was the right fit with our last name?  And did it sound good with Jude? {because I am bound to be saying the two names together for years and years to come}.  All of these were things that I considered.  Jordan has always been more concerned with the meaning of a name.  I didn't care as much about the meaning, but I grew to appreciate this concern.  We kind of see it as a way to speak blessing into our child's life.  I like that both our boys now have names with a meaning and history they can be proud of.

I was sold on another name for a very long time, but it never felt right.  I constantly second-guessed the name, which, to me, was a sign that the search wasn't over.

One day, I was doing my devotional time and read the story of Abraham and Sarah when they were told they were pregnant with their son after years of barrenness.  Sarah laughed, as she was in her 90's and thought she would never have children.  Clearly, I am not 90.  Also, I have a child already, so I know I am not barren.  But Isaac means laughter.  He was a surprise blessing to Abraham and Sarah, and it made Sarah laugh when she learned of her pregnancy.  It is Isaac who carries on the lineage of Christ, as the promise the Lord made to Abraham.

It is a stretch, but I felt somewhat of a kindred spirit to this story.  It took us over a year to get pregnant with Jude.  That is why we weren't so careful to prevent pregnancy after having Jude - we assumed that it would be another long journey when the time came.  But, surprise surprise!  It truly does only take one time.  God surprised us with the blessing of another son.  My first instinct wasn't to laugh {more like oh crap!}, but my fear has turned to laughter and optimism as I embark on this journey.
  

The name Isaac stuck with me after reading this story.  But, to me, it was too common.  I didn't want a top 100, much less a top 50 name for my child.  I searched and searched for other names.  Then I found myself dismissing names based on the sheer fact that I didn't think they went well with the name Isaac, and I just might want to use that name someday.  Ridiculous.  I know.  I realized I was doing this and my heart began to warm up to this classic, timeless name.  And I fell in love with it.

Isaac.  laughter.  May you bring joy and laughter to all you meet, sweet boy.

I love how it sounds.  I love how it sounds with Jude.  I love the meaning.  I love the story.  And, I love the boy.

We haven't experienced any laughter from Isaac yet... but plenty of tears. ;-)  I'm hoping he will compensate one day once the laughter starts.

And now, Lee.

All along Isaac's middle name was going to be Luke.  Jordan's middle name is Luke and we have a tradition in my family of passing along family names.  There wasn't really a family name in Jordan's family that he felt like passing on.  His dad has an initial for a middle name and we felt weird giving Jude a middle name and Isaac an initial. Plus the boys will bear the last name "Griffis" for their entire lives.  And this is my family's tradition.  Not Jordan's.  So, last minute, like a week before Isaac was born, we decided to go with Lee.  Mostly in honor of my sister, whose middle name is Lee.  {and, funny enough, so is her husband's}  My sister got the middle name from our paternal Grandfather and our maternal Grandmother who both share it.  It is gaining momentum as a strong family name, and it just felt right to continue it.

 

So, there you have it.  My sweet Isaac Lee. 

Isaac Lee's birth story....

* * * I know many of you have asked about this post! A week or so ago I started writing it and accidentally published instead of saved.  It wasn't finished!  I am just now finding time to complete this story.  Thanks for your patience! * * *

I need to be honest before writing this. 

I think a lot of moms have a similar worry going into their second child.  They wonder, can they love another child as much as they love their first?  They don't feel as bonded or attached during their second pregnancy, because, well, they have a baby out of utero that they have spent the past year (plus) building a relationship with and haven't had the time or energy to bask in the joy of a second pregnancy. 

This was so me.  For most of my pregnancy, I feared the day Isaac was born.  I dreaded it.  Because I knew it was going to change my relationship with Jude and I didn't know what that was going to look like.  I prayed and prayed about it.  I asked God to cover my weakness.  To give me a calm in my heart about this transition.  But I feared... 

Until the day before Isaac was due to arrive.  Something switched in my heart and my fear turned into joyful anticipation.  I told Jordan that night, I was finally more excited than anything else.  It was as if my heart finally felt what I had been praying for.  And I couldn't wait to meet my littlest son.

June 27, 2012

last belly shot - 39 weeks 4 days

Preparing for Isaac's birth was so different than Jude's.  For Jude, I spent months preparing for a natural unmedicated birth... that didn't happen.  For Isaac, I prepared myself for a birth required me to not be near as involved.  Not even laboring.  It was so surreal.  It seemed so unnatural.  But after much prayer, I made that decision based on what I felt the best was for my family... what gave me the most peace.

The morning began as most do.  We got Jude out of bed and had breakfast together.  Well, Daddy and Jude did, as I couldn't eat or drink for 12 hours before surgery.  I didn't need to be to the hospital until 10, so we asked my mom and dad to come to pick Jude up at 8:30.  For some reason, the morning seemed to go slower than most.  But in a good way.  We got Jude dressed in his "Most Awesome Big Brother" t-shirt and played for awhile.  We went outside and played in the sandbox while we waited for my parents to show up.  And it was a gorgeous morning.  Not too hot, yet.  The sun rising was a reminder of God's blessing.  I just sat with my oldest boy and enjoyed the moment and the anticipation.

Somewhere around the time Jude needed to leave with my parents, he fell and scraped his hand and even though he is usually fine with bumps and bruises, this one got to him.  It was nearing 9:15 and we needed to pack Jordan's bag yet.  Jude was screaming as we put him in his car seat.  He also usually never has a problem leaving with my parents, so this was just weird.  I took him out, held and calmed him, and tried to put him back in, but got the same response.  If there is anything I HATE it is needing to leave my kids while they are upset.  Ugh!!  I don't know why he was upset.  I think kids sometimes just have an intuition that something big is about to happen.  Even though I didn't want to, I said bye to Jude and gave him kisses through his tears, knowing that as soon as he realized he got to spend the day with his Papaw he would be all smiles.  Luckily - soon after they left I got a text from Papaw that all was well. :-)  

Jordan and I quickly got our things loaded in the car and made our way to the hospital.  We just sat holding hands and I don't remember if much was said at all.  It seemed so odd that we were going to meet our baby.  I wasn't even nervous.  Maybe it still didn't feel real.  We walked through the hospital, not in labor, through admission, and down the same halls that we had labored in great anticipation of meeting Jude just 15 months earlier.  Literally.

Even though I wasn't in labor, I still needed to be hooked up to the fetal monitors in preparation for surgery.  I sat on the bed and watched the littlest boys' heart beat beep along.  At some point, the nurse came back and asked, "Are you feeling your contractions"... "What?? No....??"... "You're having contractions two minutes apart.  Probably just pre-labor, but your body is getting ready."

After that I started paying attention and realized that the feeling of the baby in my ribs really was my uterus getting extremely hard.  But it was not painful at all.  Braxton Hicks, I suppose.  But in any case, my body was doing something.  And it made me feel a lot better about scheduling the c-section on that day, because I felt that my body was then telling me the time was near... or now.  I do wonder if I had waited it out, how long it would have taken those contractions to become active labor.  With my history, labor would have started that day, but Isaac wouldn't be born until July. ;-)

Jordan and I tried to guess how big this guy would be.  I guessed an ounce or two less than Jude, but Jordan was convinced he'd be bigger - about 8lbs or so (Jude was 7lbs 11oz).  A previous surgery was running behind (I heard rumors of a 4th c-section with someone getting their tubes tied), so we didn't go back until about 12:30. In preparation they put in my IV and drew blood.  Jordan got his OR gear on and before we knew it we were going back.

I didn't get nervous until I was in the OR.  I felt my chin start to shake, taking in what was about to happen.  I told the nurses that the last time I was in that room, I was having back to back contractions.  They were all shocked to hear that I labored the entire time last without an epidural.  Apparently it isn't as common as one might think!  I used some of my previously learned relaxation techniques to completely relax my body as they prepared the spinal.  I know a lot of this happened last time, but it was all such a blur since I was in labor and exhausted.  That may have gone to my benefit as now I was completely aware of everything going on, and it made me a little nervous.

I soon started to feel the effects of the spinal.  Jordan joined me at my side, and my fabulous OB started his work to bring my baby into the world.  Jordan was ready with camera AND video camera in hand.  (That's right, we got the entire thing on video.  And amazingly enough he got some great photos at the same time - although they are graphic and not included in this post!) 

About 15 or so minutes went by, and at 12:52pm I heard my son's first screams.  And they didn't stop. :-)  Which is a great sign. They laid him on the table next to me so I could see him as they got him warm and cleaned him off.  I could tell he was a big boy just by looking at him.  But 8lbs 12oz and 20.5"?  Big boy!!  Immediately my OB said he was glad I didn't attempt to push that kid out, because it probably would not have gone in my favor.  

 

Isaac Lee.  My sweet boy.  He came out rooting and ready to eat.  A wonderful nurse brought him over and laid him right near my face as they stitched me up and I got to meet my boy and kiss his face.  It wasn't too long before he was in my arms in the recovery room.  I hear of many hospitals where the mom is separated from her baby for hours during recovery, but I am so glad I got to hold my boy as soon as possible.  

I can hardly believe he is now over 2 weeks old.  Time flies.  This time, I am soaking up the newborn stage.  Good and bad.  I know how quickly it passes, and now that my attention is split, I know I can't give him the same one-on-one time I had with Jude.  But he is blessed to have a big brother who already clearly loves him.  

It's funny how adding to your family makes you love each of your family members even more.  Love abounds in my heart and having Isaac has not taken away from Jude - only added to it.  Watching him give kisses to his baby brother just warms my heart.  It is challenging to have two small ones, for sure, but I'm ready to roll up my sleeves and dig into motherhood.  I choose to focus on the blessings in the midst of chaos.

And so begins my journey as a Mama of two.  

Love my sweet little Isaac Lee.