My heart.

I sit here with tears streaming down my face.  Heart-broken, in a way, and hopeful and grateful in another.

There is something I haven't shared on here before, and that is the growing passion that God has been stirring in my heart for the past year or two for the orphan.  For the thousands and thousands of children who do not know the love of a mother and father.  Oh, it breaks my heart.  It breaks my heart.

Two days before I found out I was pregnant with #2 I had a serious heart-to-heart with Jordan and told him that after much prayer, I felt that we needed to seriously seek God about adoption in our future.  That it was clear to me that God's heart is for the orphan and that he was asking us to open our hearts and home to more children than he would give us biologically.  I have no idea what this looks like.  I have no idea if this means one more child or four.  I have no idea what this means of us financially.  Or how this is going to change our life.

I just know that if you feel the Spirit leading you in something, you don't ignore it.

I came across this blog shared by another friend, and it has been a tremendous encouragement to me as I start to consider this journey.  She posted this video today... which is the reason for the tears.  Just having a boy of my own, I can't imagine not loving many more boys.  I trust that God will open the doors and lead me to my children... boy or girl.  I know this journey is YEARS off (in many cases, to adopt they request that your youngest be at minimum of 2 years old, I've discovered).  And LOTS AND LOTS and even MORE prayer is required.  But, I just want to encourage you... if you also feel this tugging on your heart, don't ignore it.  Don't think of all the reasons not to.  They will always be there.  But God doesn't call you to something he doesn't intend to provide for.

Anyway... here is the video that caused the tears.

And my own boy is awake from his nap... so Mama duty is on. :-)