Jude :: 18 months old

It sure is crazy to be an 18-month-old!!

Jude is just as wild as ever.  Pretty much, if he is awake he just doesn't stop.  He doesn't walk, he runs.  He not only climbs onto chairs, but also kitchen tables.  Our baby-proofing systems just keep getting taller and taller.  We recently had to change a few doorknobs that were dummies so that he couldn't just pull the door open (of course once he figures out how to turn the knob, our efforts will be worthless).  I am definitely saying, "no", more than ever.  Oh, the joys!  One day I am sure I will miss it. ;-)

Jude was 28lbs 4oz and 34 inches tall at his last check-up.  That's right around the 90th percentile for both height and weight!  He continues to gain weight, which, at this age, doesn't always happen!  We've zoomed past 24 month clothes into 2T.  And sometimes those seem small!  He can be a picky eater (especially at dinner), but apparently he is still eating enough.  I continue to make him smoothies most days to get his nutrition in.  I load them up with kale, spinach, and peas, along with fruit and greek yogurt and he gobbles them right up!

He is also talking more and more.  Or rather, what he says is starting to make more sense. :-)  Jude has always been a babbler, and a lot of what he says is still Chinese to me, but he's definitely growing his vocabulary a great deal and is starting to put two or more words together.  He'll say "be back" or "dada bye bye" or "all done"... and many more.  He is also very much a boy with all the sound effects he makes while playing with his cars and trains.

He is still taking one nap a day, usually around 1pm.  But, I have stretched him as long as 2:30pm and he has still napped great!

He is still great with his little brother.  There have only been a handful of times he has smacked him or something - but it seemed to be more out of curiosity than to be hurtful.  He regularly likes to make sure Isaac has his paci or will find a burp cloth and have to wipe Isaac's mouth.  He's starting to like to stand next to Isaac wherever he is sitting and will just look at him and babble at him.  It's so fun, especially since Jude is just the most interesting thing to Isaac right now.

Jude is finally doing significantly better in church nursery or just being apart from us in general.  He was always the kid screaming bloody murder in nursery.  It even seemed to be worse if we were still in the house.  But in the past month or two, he seems to have finally grown out of it.  Sometimes he gets a little whiney, but we know he will stay and play.  This. is. huge. for me and my ability to do things like bible study on Monday's or participate in house church.

We love you, Jude Michael!  It's the biggest honor in the world to be able to watch you grow and learn about the environment around you.

Dear Isaac :: 3 months old

Yikes... so apparently it takes a lot more effort to get around to blogging when you have two kids.  Or maybe it is just that I am running low on blogging motivation.  Blogging is the kind of like running; the more you do it, the more you want to and the easier it becomes.  I'm on a trend of both non-running and non-blogging right now.  :-)  

On to better things...

...

My precious Isaac Lee,

You are just so much fun.  SO much fun.  You are living up to your name and have begun belly-laughing when you are tickled.  You are so interested in the world around you, and especially keep a watchful eye on your big brother.  Just taking it all in.  You sure are a trooper when your big brother walks by and snatches your paci out of your mouth, or shoves another one in.  You are just all smiles.  You are also already interested in television.  I'm pretty sure your big brother hadn't even seen a television turned on at this point in his life, but this is just another benefit of being a second child, I suppose.

You love sitting up supported by the boppy or in the bumbo and seem to be very strong already.  You have recently started to try to support your weight on your legs when we try to get you to stand.  You no longer really like to be sitting in your Rock 'n Play or bouncy seat, but would rather be walking around in Mama's arms to see what's going on or sitting up somehow.  I definitely feel like the newborn days are behind us, and you are officially an infant, becoming your own little person.

You are also a big boy.  At your three-month checkup you weighed exactly 15lbs.  Your big brother didn't weigh this much until he was close to 6 months!  But you are still a great eater, even though you are becoming increasingly distracted.  You have made it clear that you aren't a fan of the bottle, so it looks like we'll be nursing much longer than your big brother did.  You still eat about every 3 hours during the day.  You are also starting to wear 9 month sleepers!  You are just so long.

You eat every 3 hours still.  I don't see that changing anytime soon.  And your sleeping habits are about the same.  You often like to go to bed around 6:30 or even earlier sometimes.  You still get up once or twice a night to eat.

You continue to be just the sweetest boy.  I just love being your Mommy. :-)

My battle.

I need to be real for a minute tonight.

The evil one is on the prowl... trying to consume our minds, distract our intentions, and weaken our hearts.  Breeding insecurity, fear, inadequacy, loneliness... and so many more that I know too well.

I've been living there too long.  It takes work and strong intention to fill myself with truth and take each thought captive to our Creator who is truth.  I need to abide.

One thing about being a full-time, stay-at-home-mom is the lack of interaction with people who can share in a meaningful conversation.  I know, for me, there are times when I do feel lonely in the sense that I just really want to share my heart with another Mom and encourage, affirm, and understand each other.  But, too often, those get-togethers are distracted, half-finished, and I leave feeling like I didn't truly connect at all.

I really can't complain, because I have more amazing women in my life than I truly have time for.  More people that I would love to sit with over coffee and glean some wisdom from.  Encourage and be encouraged by.  Just love on.

I love that every Monday, I get to spend the morning with 10 women who are seeking after the Lord.  Every Sunday night I get to share life with our House Church and some of the most amazing women, wives, and mothers I know.  I get to be encouraged by my friend, Molly, daily as we read the word together and daily email about each of these ridiculous fears, insecurities, and frustrations that we deal with day in and day out.  I get to share life with my sister on the other side of the continent and read the same books and encourage one another in our very different lifestyles right now.

I value these times... sometimes too much... or in the wrong way, perhaps.  See, there is a sneaky little thing called insecurity.  Inadequacy.  A slippery slope I am all too familiar with.

There are many times I start to find my value and worth in what these women think of me.  I start to rely on them to tell me what I am.  And then Satan gets his sneaky little foot in there, and I start conjuring up things that didn't happen in my mind.  I said this wrong, so they must think I'm an idiot.  They said that to another person, and not me, so they must not like me as much.  On and on and on.  Insecurity.  Lies.

I don't know if it is a form of postpartum hormones, or what, but I have found myself going down that very slippery slope far too often in the past couple of months.  It got to the point, where, the places where I used to feel encouraged and uplifted did just the opposite, because I was too focused on myself and what everyone wasn't thinking, but I had convinced myself they were.  Even facebook.  Blogs.  I'd wallow in a pit of self-deprecation, believing I wasn't enough.

Ridiculous.

How's that for being real?

That's the dirt right there.  That's sin.  That's lies.

The other night I was laying awake ruminating over these falsehoods when I felt truth hit me.  Where do I find my value?  Insecurity, inadequacy, fear... these aren't characteristics of the God who calls me daughter.  

But He is love... that casts out fear.

Peace... beyond understanding.

He tells me to cast my burdens on him.

He gives me armor to crush those evil thoughts.

His power, which conquered death on a cross, lives in me.


Friends, it is a battle.  

Right now, I am reclaiming my thought life and am not going to believe those lies any longer.  I will find my value as the daughter of the King.  And my purpose to bring His Kingdom here on earth.  To serve.  To seek Him.  To be steadfast in my work.

Sisters, we need to be intentional with each other.  Lifting each other up.  Encouraging one another when we have the opportunity.  And fervently praying for one another.  Actively.  Boldly.

This season is a difficult one.  We are run into the ground by tiny little tornadoes who we love more than we could have ever imagined and have more energy than we could ever imagine.

But, let's be real, they are born into sin.  And we have the tremendous privilege and responsibility of these little lives being our mission field in this season.  And it's a battlefield.


So, what does it look like to encourage one another in this season?  The season where the coffee dates are play dates and incomplete with ten different half-finished conversations.  The season where your eyes feel to heavy to read the truth your heart needs.  The season where there are no good or bad grades to tell you how you're doing.  There is no longer an stamp of approval to affirm my hard work.  There aren't office hours.  The days are long.  The years are short.  And it's so so easy (for me) to forget that I'm a daughter of a King.  Doing the most important work there is.

 

I'm praying for you, sisters!  Even if I don't have time for coffee.  Even if we're tired and too distracted by our little blessings to encourage one another properly.  You, too, are the daughter of the King.  Fully equipped to live out his call on your life.  Loved by the creator of the universe.  Useful.  Beautiful.  Needed.


.. In all reality, how do you find yourself making sure you are filled with truth in this busy and exhausting season of motherhood?  How do you make sure you encourage (and are encouraged by) your sisters alongside you?  What does this look like in your life? ..

Dear Isaac :: 2 months old

My sweet sweet Isaac Lee,

In true second-child nature, this post is late.  And I don't have a giraffe photo to go with it.  I'm so sorry.  You and your big brother keep me busy, to say the least.  And I hope to get your giraffe photo taken soon!

You, my sweet boy, are just pure joy!  You are so quick to smile and I'm near certain I've heard a laugh or two out of you already.  If I am holding you, you always wiggle your way to look up into my eyes.  You love "talking" to me or your Dada.  And if Jude is around, your eyes are glued to him.  I look forward to the day when Jude realizes he can make you laugh.  It's sure to be a good time.

You are also a BIG boy!!  24" and 13lbs 11.5oz at your two month check-up!  This is a whole pound and a half bigger than your brother at this age!  You have rolls on your thighs, which I just love.  And you've already been in 6 month clothes for about a month already.  And your hair is really coming in already, too!  I have a feeling you are soon going to have a full head of hair like your brother.  And a blondie, just like him.  :-)

Nights have been such a blessing.  You go to bed around 7pm at night, like clockwork, and get up to eat around 2:30 or 3am, then again around 6 or 7am.  Sometimes it is just once at night; sometimes twice.  But you eat and are right back to sleep most nights.  I really can't complain.  I love that you have already switched to an early bedtime like your brother.

You had your first little cold this past week.  That's what you get for being the second child - a big brother who gets germs from church nursery and passes them along to the family.  It was sad to see you all snuffly, but we seem to be over it for the most part now.

You eat about every 3 hours and are still a champion nurser.  Usually you eat in under 10 minutes and are done.  I really can't complain in that category.

You really enjoy tummy time... and usually fall asleep.  Whoops.  Sometimes I let you snooze on your belly if I'm close-by. :-)

You have been a way easier baby than I could have wished for.  It's so fun to spend this time with you, knowing how quickly it is going to fly by.

Love you my littlest man,

Mama