day 8 :: where I'm at

One week down in this 31 days of finding freedom challenge!  I feel like I deserve something for blogging for 31 days in a row.  Can I say this is going to be MUCH MUCH harder than I expected?  In an ideal world I'd have my posts ready the day before, cute pictures edited and cropped, and it would be entering the blogosphere at 5am the next morning.

But really, that's just not where I'm at.

Today I have about 10 minutes before I get Jude up from his non-nap (oh, yeah, he's not napping anymore.  Fun, huh?).  Today, a 20 minute power nap myself trumped this blog post.  I guess I thought inspiration would come while I was sleeping.  Unfortunately, not the case.

Still, there is a lesson for me to learn here.  About my expectations.  Knowing myself, what I'm capable of, and what I need.  And adjusting accordingly.

I am a big advocate of the idea of giving up good to make space for what is best.  Sometimes, though, even my idea of best is what I find burdensome.

That means, I need to evaluate.  Just because I like what someone else is doing, and it is their best, that does not mean it has to be my best.  (I tend to fall into this trap.)

While I should give my best in what I do, there is grace.  Grace for the sloppy blog posts.  Grace for the one-or-two tv shows too many.  Grace for the lack of patience.

But nobody wants to live in a place where they constantly feel like they aren't measuring up.  We can embrace grace, but we can also change our expectations.  We can pray for a realistic perspective on what is best and what we are capable of.  And adjust our ideals accordingly.

So, instead of kicking myself for starting this blog series I'm not doing justice to (in my opinion), some new expectations.

Don't expect blog posts the night before.  If I'm lucky, you might get them.  But that probably won't happen this week.

Don't expect eloquent, captivating posts.  Or even clever stories.  Or even a recent photo.

What you can expect?

Truth.  Honesty.  Always.  And a heart that desires deeply to share life with other women, encourage my fellow Mamas, and love the Lord with all that I am.

That's just where I'm at.  And there's freedom here.